Say you buy a fresh loaf of bread from the grocery store, where you plan to use it for a variety of simple delicacies like sandwiches, french toast, and more. And like most households, you put your loaf on a designated spot in the kitchen.
However, due to a busy work or family life, you end up making other dishes or food and forget about this loaf. There is still some time before the expiry date, so there is no pressure. Yet, with each passing day, the loaf gets a little less fresh. And you remind yourself to use it before it expires. But with other priorities in your head, you again forget about the loaf. So that when you finally go to use the loaf, it's already a week after the expiry date, with the bread looking moldy and non-edible. It's a shame, a perfectly fresh loaf of bread went uneaten due to it being spoiled.
And when we express cowardice in our day-to-day living, we too can expect our hopeful and bright lives to be spoiled as well.
It doesn't take much.
But once you allow cowardice in your day-to-day living, it will degrade many areas of your life. And in this article, I'll show you three specific areas where cowardice makes things worse. They are:
Not trying anything new
A lot of things in life come with risk. And one of those things is finding love. There is the chance of getting rejected, getting your heart hurt, etc. However, this comes with the territory. Because sooner or later, the right type of love will find you.
Yet, when someone adopts cowardice in their lives, they will look at the hazardous aspects of finding love. They will think of the numerous ways they will get hurt.
So as a result, they silently refuse to find love.
They refuse to ask women out
They refuse to be vulnerable to a potential romantic partner
They refuse to enter any awkward territory.
These people will come up with a hundred excuses saying they are busy, X person isn't their type, etc. But at the core of it, it's self-deception. They just don't want to be hurt.
And if there is one lesson in life most people know about, it's that you have to be willing to get hurt to get some of the things you want. And that includes love.
The way life works out, people can find themselves in a toxic relationship. Whether its a family relationship, romantic one, friendship, etc. Somehow, people get themselves in an emotionally draining relationship.
And obviously, it seems easy to just end it right?
Well, with cowardice, it's never that simple. Instead, the toxic relationship is prolonged indefinitely. Again, there is this self-deception, but this time with the fear of being alone. They think that if this relationship ends, then they are going to be alone forever, so they hang on tighter to the toxic relationship.
Even though there are billions of people in the world, millions of people in the state/province, and hundreds of thousands of people in a city. They think they will not find anyone else, all because of the fear of loneliness.
The thing about cowardice is that it feeds your head countless lies.
And not regular lies, but illogical ones. Lies that make no sense but somehow feel justified. That's why cowardice has never been respected in countless cultures.
And even in the modern-day, cowardice is still not respected because it negatively affects how you explore the world.
Not trying anything new
One of the insidious things about cowardice is how it can secretly kill anyone's passion for life. Without even a trace, it can kill that part of your brain that craves novelty, wonderment, and exploration.
And the reason cowardice kills that part of your brain is because it feeds you the lie of not wanting to look stupid. By having this false idea in your head, you are naturally going to shun new activities.
Try a dance class? Nope!
Try a new dish? Nope!
Try being social with strangers? Nope!
As a result, you end up with a life that has very little change.
And in my humble opinion, this is tragic. Anyone who has ever lived an interesting life has explored and tried new things. And yes, they did look stupid at times. But that is nothing compared to the courage they show in living an honest and curious life.
Remember, you only have one life to live, so don't let cowardice spoil it for you.
What if you have a hard time not showing cowardice?
I understand that it's not easy to stop cowardice if that's been the main way of navigating life. That being said, you have to start building the habit of being courageous. And the best way to do that is to start small with the 'Lay 5 Bricks' Principle.
So every day, do 5 but very small courageous actions.
Like smiling at a stranger, being honest with small matters, saying no to small requests, etc. Anything where you can show courage but have small consequences.
Then after a month, start gradually increasing the boldness of the courageous actions. Maybe that's disagreeing with your colleagues, being honest about a medium-sized topic, etc.
You have to understand that no one is born courageous. However, you can develop courage by practicing it in your day-to-day life.
Before I went to therapy, I did not express much courage in my life.
I lived like a coward. I know this sounds harsh and I appreciate whatever sentiments you have. But I have to be honest with myself and you.
I was a coward.
I didn't stand up for myself when I was being treated disrespectfully. I didn't go after some golden career opportunities. I didn't ask women out that were clearly trying to get my attention.
And as a result, my quality of life was poor.
I inherently thought something was wrong with me and I wished I had another chance at life. And it wasn't until I went to therapy that I realized that I allowed cowardice to take a hold of my life. Then after this realization, I went to confront all the things I've been running away from.
Although it was scary making all these confrontations, I knew that my life wouldn't get better with being a coward. And that's what I want you to see. You can't achieve your goals or dreams with cowardice.
Alright, let's wrap this up before I get too corny:
Cowardice ruins many aspects of your life.
Cowardice damages your love life by believing the fear of not getting hurt.
Cowardice makes it difficult to leave toxic relationships due to the fear of being alone.
Cowardice dulls your life by not trying anything new, all because you believe in the fear of not looking like an idiot.
Before therapy, I lived like a coward and it hampered my quality of life.
Not many people talk about cowardice, but it's something to be aware of as you live your life. Because without noticing, it can take a hold of your life.
However, that doesn't have to happen. As long as you pay attention to yourself like a fresh loaf of bread. You'll ensure that your life won't get spoiled.